Maria's Diary

This diary belonged to Maria.

April 12th : Hello diary, my new friend. I write this on English to practice. It was a strange day in this newmhouse, so differently to the small dwelling in New York. It is, thus calmly out here, misses I the noises of the roads.

April 15th : Mr. Jacob and Mrs. Harriet seem very friendly, but not the kind of the people, which would be friends with Jerry Grant. I do not trust Jerry Grant, it have cruel eyes. Old eyes have the Corneliszs, like deep wells.

April 25 th : They never seem like my cooking. I know that I am a good cook and they eat whatever I set before them. They say even that they like it, but it never each possible joy in their voice gives.

The next section is in Polish, translated for the team by Olga Lesek.

May 2nd : God, God, why? He came into my room at night and pulled me from my bed. He tore my clothes away and I thought he would force himself on me, but no, he dragged me into the garden. The stars were all strange and there was another moon in the sky. It
descended on me, and it-

The next entries are in English.

May 10th : I feel very sick today.

September 16th : I can feel it kicking inside me. When mother was pregnant with Eva, she did not feel the baby kick until much later. The baby is very healthy.

October 31st : I heard them leave the house. I tried to run away, but I am too big to move. I crawled as far as the top of the stairs before the pain was too much to ensure.

December 3rd : Today it is my birthday. I wrote a letter home, telling them that I would not be coming home because I have too much work. It makes me laugh. I miss work. I miss walking. I miss being able to leave this bed, this room. My back is covered in sores.

December 5th : Mother visited me, and brought Eva with her. She is a whore now, and the whole city has her. I screamed at mother, and woke Jacob. He did not strike me, but he looked at me with eyes of fire, and it was the inside of my head was on fire.

January 10th : There are one hundred and seventeen stars on the wallpaper on the wall. There are sixteen panels in the wardrobe door.

January 15th : I have read all the books they will give me a dozen times. Mother visited me again, and we talked for a long time. She told me that all this was because I was a disobedient girl, and that God was punishing me. I am in hell. Jesus said, in my father’s house there are many rooms, and it is like that in the Devil’s house too. In the night, I hear all the other sinners whispering through the walls.

February 20th : I decided today that I would kill myself. It won’t let me.

March 12th : I think it’s coming. Jacob haunts me, never leaves my side. I beg him to cut it out of me, but he wants it born naturally! Naturally! As if anything about this unholy abomination was natural!

March 15th : Free.

March 16th : Jacob brought me a bitter tea to drink. Harriet came in, and she had the child with her. My child. She has named him Adam. He is perfect, beautiful, the child I always dreamed of. I am very tired. Too tired to write. Goodbye, goodbye. I am so sorry.

Maria's Diary

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